Come, it's time to go. (ILLUSTRATION: Ashley Virgilius Leong)

Come, it’s time to go. (ILLUSTRATION: Ashley Virgilius Leong)

I didn’t have anything textual or visual to add to the conversation.

So I went down the aural route instead; I created a playlist I call “Ozymandias”.

  1. Street Fighting Man by The Rolling Stones
  2. Pride (In The Name Of Love) by U2
  3. Eye In The Sky by The Alan Parsons Project
  4. If You Tolerate This Your Children Will Be Next by Manic Street Preachers
  5. Behind Blue Eyes by The Who
  6. Everybody Hurts by R.E.M.
  7. I Will Follow You Into The Dark by Death Cab For Cutie
  8. Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) by Green Day
  9. Viva La Vida by Coldplay
  10. Closing Time by Semisonic

Listen to it here on YouTube.

Interestingly, none of the artists that came to mind when creating it were Singaporean…

Quality time, in depth



I thought I’d talk a bit more on the nature of quality time. (A primer here, if you’re not familiar with the concept.)

My take: When it comes to romance, neither of you is expected to give up your life for the other.

Your individual careers and hobbies are important too; you need to be whole yourself before you become part of a whole.

But the conventional wisdom is: if you really like someone, you’ll make the effort and give them time – in a reasonable quantity, but with maximum quality.

So you should be spending enough time together, and having a great experience while you’re at it.

At the end of the day, though, you can’t base relationships solely on what happens when you’re together. Because they’re also about what happens when you’re apart.

You still have to keep in touch – although this is subjective.

What is reasonable for some may be anathema for others; X may want an update every hour, on the hour, while Y may be comfortable with a daily summary.

This is where compromise begins, but if it ends there, then it is what it is.

And – as always – if it’s not happening, it probably ain’t gonna happen.

You can’t base relationships solely on what happens when you’re together. Because they’re also about what happens when you’re apart.

Essential reading for dating and romance

(PHOTO CREDIT: Laremy Lee)

(PHOTO CREDIT: Laremy Lee)

I love reading about dating and romance, and I love sharing information that I find on the subject(s).

I’ve been doing the former, but I’ve been tardy with the latter because I’m trying not to procrastinate (though depriving myself from writing is probably not the best way to deal with procrastination, in my case).

However, a friend recently revealed to me that she was in love-limbo – that is, deciding between staying put with her partner or moving on to graze on greener pastures.

To help with her decision, I promised I’d share nuggets of knowledge on dating and romance that I’ve found over the years – an essential reading list, as it were.

I realised, after pasting all the links from the Lare-pository of Wisdom (hurhur) into an e-mail message, that it was actually worth a blog post.

So congratulations, everyone! You get to benefit from the spillover effect/positive externalities of an attempt to make good on a promise – or collateral damage, as it may turn out to be.

  1. Choosing a partner (before you start dating):
  2. Building a good relationship (dating and marriage):

I’m missing the section on “How to build a great marriage”, for obvious reasons (I haven’t reached that stage yet, although the plan is to get there soon).

Nevertheless, feel free to leave a comment with a link to your favourite article, if anyone has stuff they’d like to add.

Reinventing the office line

These office items and gadgets, some of which were on the cutting edge in 1988, now all fit on a smartphone. Well, except for the coffee. Photo by Buck Ennis.

These office items and gadgets, some of which were on the cutting edge in 1988, now all fit on a smartphone. Well, except for the coffee. Photo by Buck Ennis.

So you know how I like to predict how and why technology should change to cleave to our modern ways of living, right?

Hence, for my next trick, I’m going to ask: Technological powers-that-be, when are we going to turn our office numbers into work numbers for the mobile?

And mind you, I’m not talking about call forwarding.

I’m referring to an actual office line that can be combined with our present personal mobile phone line – but which we can choose to switch off when we’re out of the office.

Think about it. To create a clear divide between the professional and the personal, we have:

  • Personal e-mail addresses and office e-mail addresses; and
  • Personal phone lines and office phone lines.

Before the advent of mobile data technology, office tools were often fixed, and we had to enter the office to use those specific tools.

Now, we can do almost everything on the go; we can make personal calls on our mobile phones, and check our personal and office e-mail on the same device.

So at which point did companies say: “Hey! We’re gonna stop developing technology for office phone lines because there is no need to.”?

Because of this – lapse? change of focus? – we now have work-based communication taking place on our personal lines.

Some examples: Whatsapp office group chat messages, or text messages and voice calls from clients.

It’d be nice to have the option of setting “away from office” auto-replies on our work phone lines when on leave or after leaving the office, so we can draw a distinction between work and leisure.

Therefore, I’m calling this right here, right now, Lare-style: There’s a portion of the technology that’s lagging behind everything else when it comes to the modern office telephone line.

Technological powers-that-be, please do something about it. You’ll more than reap the rewards when everyone starts adopting this service.

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